A valiant attempt!

Written By: admin - Feb• 24•12

“Hey, whatchoo doing?”

“I’m working on a sign for the front door so people know they can come in here even during the festival.”

“Oh.  Hey, I think you need an apostrophe in ‘Tuesdays.'”

“Really?  Huh.  Okay.  I guess I’ll add one right… here.”

A contemplation of cheese

Written By: admin - Feb• 23•12

Sometimes when I’m bored I go shopping.  I don’t always buy things, but I like to look.  And now I also like to take pictures.

For your consideration, the wrapper of the cheese I found at Kroger.


…If it had anymore than it’s 75% butterfat, it would technically be better.

Now I’m not at all going to argue that more butterfat will most probably make anything better.  That seems obvious.

But check this out!  Mere inches away, I found this sign.

I can only surmise that the wrapper was written first, and the sign is the product of a revision by an Honorary RPB Member.  Look at the masterful use of dashes and semicolons!  As well as, you know, a basic understanding of the difference between contractions and possessives.

Burlington Coat Factory: At least they’re consistent

Written By: admin - Feb• 22•12

You’ll have to take my word that this comes from a Burlington Coat Factory ad.

Actually, you won’t.  I can provide some evidence.  You can also just click through above to the website and see for yourself…

Plus, I’ve written about them before.  REPEAT OFFENDERS.

Older does not necessarily mean wiser

Written By: admin - Feb• 15•12

Susan and Michael found this sign from a company that’s been around, apparently, for a hundred years… and still hasn’t mastered the apostrophe.

(You have to get a little squinty with this one, but it welcomes “homeowner’s.”)

Target comma missing the.

Written By: admin - Feb• 01•12

Reporter #1 says,

There are many reasons to dislike Target‘s American Girl knockoffs. This, however, may be the last straw.

You know how when you go someplace like Target there’s always a kid having a temper-tantrum in the toy aisle? Like, full-on screaming, on the ground, kicking, bodily fluids flying everywhere as they thrash around?

That’s how I feel inside my head, looking at this!

We know not whom to snub!

Written By: admin - Jan• 27•12

I’ll let Reporter #1 tell this story:

I found this postcard in the ladies’ room of the local outlet mall this weekend.

 I wish they’d managed to indicate what STORE it was for so that I could boycott them on account of their complete lack of a grasp of English grammar.
(I’ve compressed the image a little, so you’ll have to take my word for it — the store isn’t mentioned in the fine print either.)
I’m almost disheartened enough with the world that I’ll let the singular use of “product” stand here.  It might be businessspeak in the department store world, who knows.  But “button downs” really needs a hyphen and “womens” and “mens” are just unforgivable.  WHY DO YOU HATE THE APOSTROPHE, WORLD? WHY.


Written By: admin - Jan• 25•12

SmashBURGER, that is.  Because apparently you guys like to make sure that when I do an RPB post, I get hungry.  Or is it something about food that makes sign-writers less careful?  I mean, in this case, the name of the restaurant is written incorrectly.

Anyway, my father is once again proud to have a use for his smartphone.

I’m given to understand that after photographing this my parents went about the business of eating delicious hamburgers, and didn’t in fact turn green and rip their shirts and pummel things.  But I prefer to imagine it the other way.

One for the jury.

Written By: admin - Oct• 04•11

Lisa R. found this one.  I’m inclined to want to accidentally kick it as I walk past myself, but I can see a certain argument that there’s no problem here.  Votes?


So much reading between the lines

Written By: admin - Sep• 30•11

Reporter #1 sent me a text.  The body of the text said only

Haircuts: C.  Punctuation: F.

I so, so hope that this picture was taken in a fit of pique inspired by a haircut disaster.  I mean, not that I wish a haircut disaster on Reporter #1 or any of her loved ones, but that makes the story so much funnier.  “You’ll give me an unremarkable haircut?  Oh yeah?? Well, I shall criticize your punctuation.  How about that?”

[Note that the apostrophe is abused twice, since “sams” is not a thing.]

There are too many of them!

Written By: admin - Sep• 28•11

Kacia innocently asked, “Did I send you this one last year?”  And… I don’t know.  I went off to see if I could find it, but I only ended up getting distracted by my own posts.  There are a lot of posts on this site.  And a good number of them are from fairs, even a couple from the Minnesota State Fair, which may be famous for its food-on-a-stick but still provides Kacia with fodder every year.

So:  I have no idea, Kacia.  And I don’t care.  It’s egregious even if it’s recycled.


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