Written By: admin - Jun• 09•14

Where to start? The spelling? The punctuation? The bizarre nationalism?

Thanks, GrammarTroika Sister #2!


Toaster almost achieved…

Written By: admin - May• 30•14

Reporter #1 is finding kindred spirits for RPB recruitment.


I expect better of the apostrophe-friendly Wegmans!


Written By: admin - Feb• 24•14

…or else typo.


I was actually thinking there’s a third option, and this could be a cutesy attempt by Lands’ End to brand their particular pants, since the company itself has an unusual (at least when it’s correct) apostrophe in its name. But you see that the second instance doesn’t have the apostrophe. So we’re back to Reporter #1’s guess:

I never knew pants could have a sale…

Fine print

Written By: admin - Feb• 21•14

First of all, I’d like to nitpick the financial argument being made here.


Let’s suppose that a beverage costs a dollar. Why not advertise this as a breakfast for $5.99 instead of one that comes with a caveat? It’s weird.

Oh, and ALSO?

  1. ELLIPSES HAVE THREE DOTS. Not five, and not two (unless it’s on the way to three). Not seventeen. THREE.
  2. You’re missing an “a” there.
  3. ELLIPSES HAVE THREE DOTS. With no spaces between them, either. JUST THREE DOTS.

I’m not even sure that GrammarTroika Sister #2 was worried about the ellipses when she sent this in. But I am. I REALLY AM.

Thanks, GTS#2!


Is consistency so much to ask for?

Written By: admin - Feb• 07•14

I just want rules, man. I don’t care so much what the rules are; I just want them to exist and command respect.


Dave Barry once postulated that apostrophes were designed to alert us all to the fact that an “s” was coming up. I’m fine with that. Let’s do it. Let’s ju’st all do it con’si’stently.

Thank’s, GT’S#1!

Little kids eat ivy.

Written By: admin - Feb• 05•14

Apparently kids also exchange.


Susan W.-in-DC (I realized I have two Susan W. friends!) found this on a list of corporate logo fails. It is indeed company policy; here’s the website:


Thanks, Susan!


Written By: admin - Jan• 27•14

Kacia sent this in, apparently as a plea for rescue. She captioned this “early morning breakfast with my dad.” It’s a little photographic PTSD capsule reminding me of the years of my life in which piles of snow like that lay in between me and things to eat. And why are you having “breakfast” in the middle of the darkest part of night? Move south, y’all; it’s sunny down here!



Anyway. Yes. This is awful.


I was going to joke that they could save themselves by presenting a mascot-figure in a snazzy suit and name him “Gentleman Fashion.” But then I noticed the misspelling.

I hope it didn’t put you off your grits and co-cola, Kacia. What? You don’t eat grits and co-cola for breakfast up where the snowdrifts are eyebrow-deep?

Focusing on the things you can change

Written By: admin - Jan• 08•14

Ben submits this recent Republican talking-points memo for your enjoyment.

I love that Ben made it all the way to the last paragraph before he found the thing that really made him mad: the apostrophe abuse.


I’d also like to say some stuff about correlation not equaling causation, especially in something as time-delayed and complex as unemployment rates, but… I don’t want to harsh my Wednesday mellow.

Thanks, Ben!


Written By: admin - Dec• 16•13

Reporter #1 says this is a cute game that’s lousy at punctuation.


I think phone-games are right up there with Facebook on the “Don’t expect anything” scale, Reporter #1. But you keep on with your optimism.

Friday meditation!

Written By: admin - Dec• 13•13

As I’ve said, I’m willing to give a lot of leeway for translations and writing by non-native speakers. But.


Thanks for the moment of WHUH, GrammarTroika Sister #1!

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