As Reporter #1 notes, we’ve had several posts from Tops Friendly Markets recently. They’re not quite MARTA, but we thank them nonetheless.
ANYWAY, she found this cutie in an email flyer and sent it right along.
Reporter #1 wonders “What is a Tasting Shrimp?” I actually read it slightly differently and wondered what a new-tasting shrimp would taste like. Then I got a little nauseous.
Fresh new look! Same old spelling and punctuation errors! Wahoo! Also, I intend to post more pictures of my pets here this year, because ZOMG Google Analytics. COMMENTS WOULD HELP TOO I’M JUST SAYING.
So, welcome back, welcome to 2012, keep your eyes peeled and your cameras handy, and let’s get ready to red pen!!
Colleen’s excited to submit a non-English oopsie. But honestly, this is such a common expression in English I’m not sure about giving this one a foreign language pass.
Also, now I want whatever it is that’s green and Thai.
I have a new definition of insanity: trying to hold online ads to any kind of standard of… well, anything. Common decency, common sense, basic grammar, take your pick. This one only abuses a hyphen, but you know I’m right about the genre.
Reporter #1 fears we should file this under “totally lost causes,” and I’m pretty sure she’s right.
Okay, so Kacia’s only in medical school, but she’s still totally qualified to point out how excellent this advice is.
I think it’s also probably a good idea to warn people before posting pictures of fences like this, because my personal eyeballs want to explode from the pattern. But hey, I will suffer through it to provide this valuable service. Smoking propane is dangerous, kids. Just say no.
It’s actually Meg who has this in writing, as it appeared in her mailbox. I’ve taken the liberty of cropping the heck out of the postcard and sprinkling some black boxes around because Meg actually lives here.
Isn’t that always the way, Meg? You pay real money for something and THEN there’s a big sale. Grr.
Here’s my thing about the holidays: sometimes they suck. And if you’re having sucky holidays, then having people wish you happy holidays or ask what your plans are etc. can actually make it worse.
So here’s the RPB position on The Holiday Time Of Year: whatevs! If you’re having a bad week, you keep on with your bad-week self. If you’re having a fabulous time with your picture-perfect holiday family celebrations, props to you too. Stuff happens and you’re not a failure if your turkey scorches or you’re eating leftover mac and cheese and watching the Firefly marathon on TV.
That said, I shall also provide this post in honor of the day, whether it serves to cheer the cheerless or merely amuse the Rockwellians among us. Because it’s always nice when something goes right.
For starters, an example of one of my pettiest of pet peeves:
I know this is a lost cause. I know it’s an evolving language. I also don’t care. Bah humbug. So I almost kissed the waiter at this restaurant:
All right, Mr. DeMille, this menu is actually ready for its close-up!
LOOK at this. As always, I’m okay with artsy anti-capitalization and sparse punctuation, because they appear to be deliberate and they’re consistent. But would you look at that use of “jus” as a noun? and the lack of “au” in front of that noun?
Happy sigh. Also, restaurant link, because links are the least I can do for this kind of excellence.
…for that has-everything annoyance on your gift list! Because seriously, who *wouldn’t* want a danger laser?
This idea brought to you by Reporter #1, who presumably received no compensation from the Danger Laser Corporation for this pitch.
Q found this, and my reaction is mostly “What?”
I’m so busy trying to parse when I could use a Groupon that I barely even notice the totally random capitalization, spacing, punctuation, etc.
I’m with you, Reporter #1. I really am. You said:
For the love of Pete, just shrink the font a couple of points to get the space btw every & day!
I just think this is One Of Those Things that is so far gone we’re tilting at windmills. Only moreso, if you know what I mean.
It’s worth noting that Reporter #1 is married to a person whose name is not Pete. Also, I really want to capitalize the “f” in “follow.”